Soon!

So my good bye barbie ended more in a indoor picnic but that was fine too. Everyone loved my cake and it was nice to have everyone around, one last time before I'm off. It all ended in one of my favourite bars here in Moabit, we got kicked out by the staff at 4 when we were the last customers left haha. 

The day after J, one of my flatmates, and his girlfriend cleans the whole space while I was in bed not feeling well at all... 

Today I went and got a pair of jeans for my boyfriend and the sales person thought is was for me and asked how I'm going to wear them... Jeans 8 sizes too big... Sure. That was a good laugh! 

So tomorrow it might be my final shift at F, the cafe I'm working at and where I hope to stop working, so sick of it, and then I'm meeting kind of my closest friends here for dinner and drinks. Looking forward!

And then it is almost already time to start packing!!! 

Oh it's so close and I'm super excited now!!!

Exploding!

my room looks as if a bomb hit it... There is just no time to clean it seems like... Today I handed in the last project of this semester, the stupid hiking map, will be interesting to hear the grade, but it does not really matter to me anyway...
So friday I have an exam and then there will be my Good-bye-barbie but the weather prediction does not look promising at all... so it might end up in an indoor thing... we will see. fingers crossed!
weather in Berlin been pretty shit lately again. it feels like autumn not spring and I'll have autumn and winter soon anyway so gimme spring please!
Today I went to the new apple store here in Berlin, and I don't like it. it feels as if you are on a giant bazar and not an actuall shop... it took ages until someone came, still I made an appointment... but in the end I got a brand new iPhone 5 which took 4 minutes to take home then. so I am happy in the end.
Went to & other stories with my flatmate cause he hasn't been there before but it is just not in my budget to buy anything there atm :( just saving money money money, going on my nerves.
well. I study now for this boring exam on friday!
so soon I'll be back in Melbourne with my boyfriend, all I can think of and the only thing that motivates me right now!

15 days and 16 hours.

I am so super excited. as you see in the titel, it is definitly not not long at all until I'm back in Australia. An so much exciting stuff is going to happen. I can't really believe it.

I will have to interesting internships in cartography, which will look great on my cv and will be super intersting for myself.
I will see heaps more about Melbourne and expirience the Melbourne life finally.
I will have a good friend in Melbourne for almost the whole time.
I will go on a vacation to Fiji, which is just the most amasing thing ever, or almost.
I will see snow in Australia!
I will go to Sunshine Coast (how can a place named like this?) and Noosa and Brisbane.
I might see Ulluru too.
I will live together with my boyfriend for 4 months! The longest time ever!
We will spend our two year anniversary together!
I will start the first course out of my Master Degree!

So until then. I just have a few things to do, as finishing a hiking map, finishing the layout of a hiking map, write three exams, hopefully get a scholarship, get travel insurance sorted, buy some presents, enjoy the start of summer in Berlin, a short visit at home with a lot of beer involved...

Stay tuned, it will be atemraubend!

need more time!

I have too much to do. My to do list is getting longer and longer every second it seems like. But the most depressing is probably that none of my close friends here in Berlin have time to meet the weekend before I am leaving due to strange reasons. it makes me sad. And I am already sad because of the mass of work I still have to do. At least I found a nice girl who is subleasing my room. We are signing the contract on Saturday.

TO DO:
Write four exams (13.Mai, 21.Mai, 22.Mai and 24.Mai)
Hand in two projects (17.Mai and 22.Mai)
Hand in a scholarship application (latest 15.Mai, still need my language certificate)
get an internatinal driving licence
buy a cabin bag with weels
fix health insurance
buy a bag for my camera (from Crumpler, but the Australian ones are much better then the European ones... dillema!)
Go home for the annual beerfestival and my mums birthday (17.Mai until 20.Mai)
Meet friends in Berlin before I leave
Sell some stuff to get money
Work to get money
Buy more analog filmrolls
Buy presents for people in Australia
and the list goes on and on and on...

it looks like I might stay in australia the whole 4 months of my break in the end anyway. this would be so amasing! Cross your fingers that nothing goes wrong now. waiting for the second internship agreement to be send back to me, need the signature of my supervisor and then change my flight booking, finish my scholarship applications and then I am off for a wonderful time! Kabuuum!

I started all over again with for my uni project. the hiking map. and I did get a lot done last night. So I should stick with it and work, work, work. but I am tired, we have a public holiday tomorrow and my friends are meeting tonight, does not sound good to work right? but then my dad is coming in two days and I don' know how long he will stay but I am looking forward to it and it will be fine.
I ordered some sunglasses but non of them overwhelmed me, if sunglasses are able to do that... another one should come friday, so we will see... should get some food into my stomache if I want to go out tonight and drink?! oh oh.

I'm frustrated. I have to do a project for uni, a hiking map. something I will never want to do for a living. seriously never. you scan a topological map, insert it in illustrator and then repaint everything just with the details you need. as in my case, hiking routes... boring! I'd rather learn how to program stuff and more fun things! argh.

Couch

I liked the Stockholm couch from ikea a long time now and my Swedish babysitter family here in Berlin did use to have one of them and I had quite a bit of time lying or sleeping on it and it is super comfortable and looks so good.
My boyfriend is into leather and this might be kind of a good combination but who knows what the future will bring...

it has been a while and it might be a while again too.
a whole month has gone. and a lot has happened...
I might just use a swedish list, translated into english and maybe it will help...

10 things I like:
spring in Berlin
I booked my flight to Australia
my new friend Hanna and the fact that she just lives 6min by bike away
my wonderful La Sardinia Camera and all those amasing pictures
buttercup flowers, long lasting flowers make me happy
instagram, addiction
babysitting Isa, the most happy little girl in the world
waking up from kisses
books
my cameras

9 things I don't like:
how death tears us apart
messy flatmates
my work at the cafe
storms and lightnings
allergic reactions
count money
being paranoid
dog-ears!!!
smoking in bars and clubs

8 blogs  I started following:
absolutlisen
beattielanser
brookeholm
finelittleday
theredthreadblog
craft.tutsplus
floras
Frankie

7 things I want to do in the future:
have a nice beautiful veggie garden
been to every continent
finish my BA and MA
visit Edinburgh
drive around Australia
write a book
sell a pice of art done by me

6 things I am afraid of:
being left alone
become a bad person
to one day look back and not like my life
to loose people I love/care about
become boring
depression

5 places I like being at:
Midsommar somewhere in Sweden
close to the sea
deep into snow
besides my byfriend in bed
bookshops

4 words describing me:
literate
friendly
creative
lazy

3 things I am looking forward to:
flying to Australia in less then 34 days and seeing my boyfriend and Florence and everyone else!
my birthday, in winter for the first time this year
great food and Espresso Martinis

2 good movies:
the perks of being a wallflower
the eternal sunshine of the spotless mind

One good song:
Autre ne Veut: play by play

WTH

monday is almost over and I am so exhausted. I had an exam today and a presentation and well, let's just say it is over and I am happy about that. Neither did go as it should but it is over, woop.
At the same time, my new semester started and it just feels too much already. I only have three courses but they are compressed into two months, so it is a lot going on here... And in every course we have lessons and exercises and exams and presentations and projects and handinds too. so, just a lot.

But let's forget about this for a minuite. It is waffel day in sweden today and I might bake some for dinner tonigt, or rather something "normal"? but I am leaving on thursday morning to visit my best friend and I have almost nothing in my fridge, as usual... we will see. I'm out.

:(

I'm trying to sleep but I'm just moving around in my bed. Can't find the right position to fall asleep in even thou my eyes hurt from crying and a lack of sleep. I don't like those moments and situation when most of what is going to happen is unknown. I love having plans and almost a plan about the next half year. About what will happen and when and of course everything planned and approved. But right now I have no clue where I will be from June to October and it is killing me. I hate waiting and not being able to make actions :( And I freaking miss my boyfriend and need him right now...

crah test dummy needed?

So. I should study but instead I am lying in bed with a headache und everything is crashing it seems like. I still dont have a clue where I am going to do my internship from June and it is killing me. I need to buy a flight ticket if I do it in Australia but I don't have the money right now. Nor a place. And this exam tomorrow. Never been so blank for an exam ever. This is going to fail. But, I might not care. I don't know. I just want it to be next week. All the stress would be over by then. and we still don't know what is happening about the Lacrosse Game on sunday. Wooph. over and out.

Addiction

Shit

this was what I saw this morning when I woke up at 6:40 and I could not really believe my eyes... and since then it hasnt stopped snowing!!! It is insane! and it is not even good snow but a really moist one. so if you walk and the snow is falling on you, it is already melting and going into the fabric. no good. Anyway. it is supposed to be spring!!! not winter! and we will have -8 on saturday! totaly insane!

I'm supposed to study. Exam on thursday but I can just not motivate myself. Am skipping lacrosse practise as a punsih... but still it is not really helping...

watch this!

dying a cuteness death...

cake x2

 

So this is the result of what I baked last night. I started with a nice and easy berry cake until I realised that my flatmates twin sister would come the next day and she is a vegan and I had already added the eggs so I decided to bake a second one, had bananas over anyway which I wanted to turn into a bananacake/bread anyway the next days. And I always got so frustrated with my old flatmates who baked something and then always had the excuse I could not eat because it had milk products. oh how hard is it to buy margarine instead of butter? most of the time you don't taste the difference anyway, so that was another reason why I decided to bake a second one. to not be like them!

VEGAN Banana-Almond paste-Cake

ingredienses:

100ml vegetable oil

100g sugar

2 bananas or more

100 g almond paste

2 bags of bakingpowder ot 4 teaspoons

300g flour

1 teaspoon cinamon, vanillasugar, cardamon (whatever you feel like)

a bit of salt

mix the sugar (I used brown but white would be fine too), salt, cinnamon, vanillasugar and oil until the sugar dissolved. add almond paste and bananas and mix it until it is almost a liquid. mix flour and bakingpowder and add it to the other mixture. add ricemilk/oil to get a more liquid dough. now you could even add peanuts or dates or stuff like that. then fill the dough in a tin and bake in the oven 175 degrees around 50 min, make sure the cake does not burn, use tinfoil on top after around 35 min

enjoy!

To be.

I've been reading a post about what is the best about being in a relationship. and gosh. I so agree and it made me so sad. Anna is writing about the days when she and her husband are doing different things in their home but still she can feel his presence and she prefers nights on the sofa together then travelling. she says that it is important that you give each other space, there is no need to always do everything together. but man. I would love to be able to always do everything together. but with 16 000 km that's not really something which is possible. her post made me realise once again, how much I miss my boyfriend around me. I am a home person. I like being at home, fixing/creating/baking/reading/do whatever something at home. but alone? that'S no fun. It is no fun baking a cake when there is noone who really appreciates the cake. It is no fun coming home when there is noone replying to your "hello". It is no fun falling asleep when there is noone for either a good night nor a good morning kiss. No fun. My life is no fun right now. I hate my work at the cafe, I hate that exams are coming up and I should study, I hate that there is still snow and ice outside and we can't play lacrosse outside, I hate being alone, I hate that I don't have power/energy to go out with friends tonight,... I could just go on and on and on. There is only one thing I love right now. One person who is just too far away. And, different time zones suck big times!

Hello goodbye

I just had two days of mostly doing nothing and almost being in bed the whole time. Much needed after a really busy period in my life.
I had the most amazing trip to Australia and came back one week before my exam period started which I did quite well. Then a flight to Munich and a needed reunion with my boyfriend there, my sisters wedding and a few city trips in Germany and a last week in Berlin together until R left again for down under... And so now I am back alone in Berlin, exams are coming up again but I started to enjoy spring and got a new hobby, lacrosse. I still need to find motivation to study and do some work but it will come. The whole internship story is going on my nerves and long distance anyway but there is nothing to change about it, cause love just hurts especially when you are apart. Oh I can't wait and I am already counting until I finally got my degree next year in July!
So much about what is going on and now just a few pictures

Spring? Winter!

Well winter is again back in Berlin. Last week Thursday I was already wearing my spring jacket and now we have so much snow again and it is really cold again. I'm somehow happy I did not listen to my coworker who tried to convince me to clean my windows when the sun came back last week! Windows would have been all dirty again by now...!